


No Longer Alone

by blackriddlerose



Category: Horizon: Zero Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Love, Self-Discovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-02-17
Packaged: 2019-10-15 19:58:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17535245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackriddlerose/pseuds/blackriddlerose
Summary: Varl is nothing if not persistent, so when he sees the burden Aloy is shouldering alone he insists on helping bear some of it. But Aloy is hesitant, after all, he is Nora and the burden she bears does not pair well with the Nora faith.5 chapters of their growing relationship.





	1. Changing Views

Varl watched the Thunderjaw from the safety of the mountain, each vibration from its large footsteps shaking his already rattled bones.

Swinging its tail, the Thunderjaw leveled everything within reach. The young Brave was seething with rage. He wanted nothing more than to rush the beast and sink his spear into its neck. But he didn't move. There were too few of them left and no one at full potential.

Another vibration shook through Varl's body, his spear arm aching from a bad fall on his shoulder earlier.

The familiar sound of an arrow whistling through the air caught his attention. Whipping his head up, Varl caught the glint of a tear blast arrow right as it attached to the large machine. The blast broke off the detection device from the back of the Thunderjaw as it left the machine stumbling.

Following the path of the arrow, Varl spotted the familiar mop of red hair slinking silently up the hill. "Aloy," Varl grinned, his voice barely louder than a whisper. "Aloy!" he said again, this time his voice a rallying cry as he charged at the machine, the few remaining Braves right beside him.

A blast bomb sank into the Thunderjaw's side, knocking it off balance even further. Taking it a step further, Varl shoved his spear into the beast's leg, the one supporting most of the weight. Ripping off several pieces of its armor, the machine lost its balance completely, toppling onto its side.

Another blat bomb landed at its head, ripping off the lasers from its mandibles. One of the Braves broke out a rope caster and covered the Thunderjaw in wires, keeping it down as Varl and a few others ripped into its side with their spears. The remaining Braves sent arrows flying and Varl caught sight of Aloy with her spear.

\---

“Aloy,” Varl grinned, greeting the Seeker at the entrance of the mountain.  

“Varl,” Aloy smiled.  “How are you? How is everyone?”

“We are all better with you here,” Varl said.  “Come, the High Matriarchs are waiting for you,” he said, gesturing for her to follow.  “A lot has happened.”

“I can see that and I wish I brought good news,” Aloy said, her voice lowering.  Varl was silent as he led Aloy to Teersa. 

He stood back as Aloy entered into the mountain, his jaw dropping some as the door opened and the redhead he admired so much walked through.

\---

“Are you alright?” Varl asked as he took a seat next to Aloy.

“Just a lot on my mind,” the redhead responded as she looked out over the Embrace from the top of the lookout tower.

“You look angry,” Varl started, watching ALoy’s face closely as he continued.  “Is it because of what we did? The bowing and being called Anointed?”

Aloy sighed, her shoulders slumping and suddenly she looked older.  “I grew up with only Rost. Whenever we passed by a village, I would hear them whispering.  I tried to ignore it and Rost tried to distract me with training. But their voices were always there, in the back of my mind.  I used them to push myself forward, to train for the proving, to win. The voices never left though,” Aloy said, staring down at her hands as she played with an arrow head that had been sitting on the nearby table. “I never felt like a Nora, I only wanted to win the Proving so I could get answers.”  

Varl watched her quietly.  She needed someone to talk to more than anything he realized.  

“So when the voices changed from insults to praise, to worship, it angered me.  It was sudden and new and scary and I wanted the insults back, the familiarity back,” Aloy admitted.  “They jumped so quickly from hate to worship, that mentality scared me. I am not Nora. I never felt like a Nora.  I don’t want them worshipping me.”

“Unfortunately, I think it’s too late for that,” Varl said as he turned to face Aloy.  

“I could get them to stop, I know a way but it would be cruel and as much as I hate them, I couldn’t bring myself to do that,” Aloy said, trying to discreetly wipe the start of her tears away.

“What are you talking about, what would be cruel?” Varl asked, scooting a little closer.  She was worrying him now. Just what had happened to her since he last saw her?

“The truth,” Aloy answered with a pained smile.  “The truth of the Old Ones, the ruins, the machines, of All-Mother.”

“You are carrying this burden all by yourself aren’t you?” Varl asked, not knowing the burden but recognizing the weight of it.

Aloy nodded, trying to wipe the tears away again.  “I don’t know who to tell. There is only one other person that knows but he disappeared.”

Varl tentatively reached out and wiped the tears away from Aloy’s eyes, feeling her tense under his gentle touch.  “After this battle, after we get back from Meridian, tell me. Let me shoulder some of the burden,” Varl said as he pulled her toward his chest.  “You aren’t alone anymore.”

Aloy wrapped her arms around his torso, her head buried in the furs at his neck as she broke down.  All of the pain and frustration, all of the sadness and loneliness that had accumulated since before the Proving, since Rost’s goodbye outside the village gates, it all came out.  

She hated herself for losing control like this, for letting someone see her be this weak.  But it felt good, letting it out and feeling Varl’s arms wrapped around her, that feeling of security.  “You aren’t alone anymore,” Varl whispered again. 


	2. Marching On

Varl was tired but his feet kept marching, more out of the years of discipline drilled into him from his mother than anything else.  His whole body ached, every lift of his leg sent a dull ache through his but he drowned out the pain by listening to his mother.

War Chief Sona was going over the list of things the Braves will not do when they reach Meridian and the Sundom in general.  He felt like a child again, “Do not go over there, do not eat that, do not question the Matriarchs.” The never ending list of do-nots that barely eased once he won his Proving and became a Brave.  He let out a sigh as kept marching, Daytower coming into sight. 

“You better be listening, Varl,” Sona said.

“Of course, War Chief,” Varl replied.   Aloy had no problems with Meridian, he had even seen her briefly in Carja clothing and it didn’t look ‘tainted’.   Cold maybe, with her midriff exposed to the cold of the Sacred Lands, but not tainted. It couldn’t just be because she was a Seeker and Anointed by All-Mother.

Coming up on Daytower, Varl watched the guard yell for the gate to be opened for them.  Waiting for Sona to lead, Varl noticed the hesitation in her body. Aloy had left the Sacred Lands, stepping foot over the border with zero hesitation, yet here stood the War Chief, the bravest person he knew, with a hint of fear in her eyes.

“Mother,” Varl said gently, letting her know she was not alone.  They were all nervous.

Steeling herself, Sona stepped up to the gate, taking her first step out of Nora lands.

“You’re headed for Meridian?” the guard asked.

“Yes, for our Anointed,” Sona answered.

The guard nodded, knowing who they meant.  It wasn’t too long ago that another Nora came through here and since then nothing but rumors of her saving the king and the Sundom had reached him.  “Follow the path and watch out for the Stormbird not far from here, it seems to be more agitated than usual,” the guard warned. “When the weather clears you should be able to get a glimpse of Meridian on top of the mesa,” he added.

“Thank you,” Varl said as the small group headed through the guard tower and into the sandy landscape.

\---

“Now I understand why the Carja are all half naked,” Varl said as he took off the furs from around his sweltering neck.  

A couple of others mumbled their agreement, adjusting their outfits and throwing the furs on the wagon of supplies.  

“Is that it?” Teb asked, pointing at a distant mesa, his eyes shielded against the sun.

The other Braves looked over too, spotting the large mesa with some smoke rising from the top.  “It’s huge,” one of the Braves said. “All the Nora could probably fit up there, with room to spare.”

“Keep walking,” Sona said.  “We want to get there before dark.”

\---

“You all must be the Nora who came for Aloy,” a young woman said, greeting the travelers at the bridge to Meridian.  “My name is Talanah,” she smiled. “Aloy asked me to get you all settled in Meridian.”

“Thank you,” Varl nodded.  

“We are not staying in the city, take us somewhere quiet,” Sona demanded and Varl flinched a little at the harshness of her words.

Talanah didn’t seem fazed though.  “Aloy told me that would probably be the case.  This way,” Talanah said, starting down a well worn path away from the city.

\---

“How is everyone?” Aloy asked, walking up to the Nora camp.

“Tired from the walk and burning to death, how do the Carja stand this heat?” Varl half joked.

“By being half naked apparently,” Aloy smiled.  “Thank you for coming, all of you.”

“The Anointed willed it,” Sona said, matter of factly.

Varl caught sight of Aloy’s frown and grabbed his water skin.  “Do you know a good place to refill?” he asked.

“Over here,” Aloy gestured.  “Thank you,” she added when the two were out of earshot.

“Mother came for you,” Varl said.  “The others because you are Anointed but you know how much of a stickler she is.”

“Where did you and Vala learn to smile?” Aloy teased.  “Certainly not from her.”

Varl dipped his water skin into the creek, a chuckle leaving him.  “Our grandmother. Mother really is a black sheep in our family. But she is the reason I am the fighter I am.”  Taking a seat in the grass next to Aloy, Varl looked up at the city. “I remember you mentioning how loud Mother’s Heart was when you first entered.  I understand now what you mean.”

“The Carja are flashy, that’s for sure,” Aloy said.

“What will we be fighting tomorrow?” Varl asked.

“Machine, corrupted machines, Deathbringers, and Eclipse soldiers,” Aloy answered.

“I’ll be by your side this time,” Varl said.  “Sharpened my spear just for this occasion,” he grinned.

“Oh?  He’s serious then,” Aloy teased.  

“It was just so much fun last time we fought together,” Varl teased back.  

“Thank you,” Aloy said.  “I needed this.”

“Who would have thought that the All Mighty Nora huntress, the legendary machine tamer, knew how to smile and laugh?”

“It’s has been a while since I last did, almost forgot how,” Aloy said and Varl caught the hint of sadness in her voice.  

“So how much of these rumors are true, about a king bowing down to you and something with a bomb not destroying the whole city?” Varl asked.

“Somewhat, probably not as wild as you heard,” Aloy snorted.  

“Still sounds heroic to me,” Varl said, playfully leaning into her.  “You’ve done a lot for all the tribes,” he continued, a little more seriously.  “It would be nice to have good relations with our neighbors again.”

“Careful there, Sona wouldn’t like hearing that.  A Nora who wants friends outside of the Sacred Lands, you aren’t like other Nora,” Aloy said, throwing back at him the phrase he used to describe her not too long ago.  

Varl grinned at those words.  “A certain redhead must have rubbed off on me.”


	3. The Truth Comes Out

“Don’t tell me you Nora don’t drink?” Erend laughed as he tried to hand Varl a mug of Scrappersap. “Come on, it was a hard battle won,” he encouraged.

  
Varl could feel the death glare his mother was shooting him but he saw Aloy with a mug so he figured it was safe. “Thanks,” Varl said, taking the mug and clanking it against Erends before taking a sip.

  
Coughing, Varl struggled not to spit the drink out. “What is this?” he demanded.  
“Scrappersap,” Erend laughed. “Drink up, it will put some hair on your chest,” Erend said before heading over to some of his men.

  
“I should have warned you, sorry,” Aloy said, a smile on her face as she took a seat next to Varl.

  
“You’re grinning too much to be sorry,” Varl muttered but Aloy caught the small smile on his lips. “Are you really drinking this stuff?”

  
“I needed something strong,” Aloy admitted. “How is everyone?”

  
“Recovering, I think their spirits will lift some once we are back in the Sacred Lands. And mother’s mood,” Varl added with a sly grin.

  
Aloy chuckled a little, she could feel Sona’s sour attitude from the other end of the bar. “What do you think of Meridian?”

  
“It’s big,” Varl said, leaning his head against the wall. “I feel small and insignificant compared to this city like there would be no place or purpose here for me with so many people around,” Varl admitted. “But I don’t hate it, not like I thought I would,” he finished, taking a sip of his drink.

  
“I felt lost at Mother’s Heart for the proving,” Aloy said. “It was more people in one place that I ever saw, so when I got to Meridian I was worried I’d feel lost,” Aloy mused, taking a sip of her drink. “But I didn’t because I quickly made friends and allies. The city didn’t seem so big.”

  
“You have friends and allies back in the Sacred Lands,” Varl said, worried that she wouldn’t come back home with them.

  
“I do and the Sacred Lands no longer feel so lonely and painful,” Aloy agreed. “But they still don’t feel as welcoming, too many bad memories. Too many people trying to worship me after talking in hushed tones about me like I was a disease.”

  
“Will you stay here then?” Varl asked, his heart dropping even further.

  
“I’m not sure. There is one last thing I have to do, some closure I have to find first. After that, I don’t know.”

  
“All Mother still has plans for you, doesn’t she?” Varl asked, finishing the rest of his drink despite the burning in his throat.

  
“She does,” Aloy answered. “But I don’t even know where to begin.”

  
“Is there anything I can do to help?”

  
“I don’t know,” Aloy sighed. “That is something for you to decide.”

  
“Why the sour faces?” Erend asked, stumbling over to them and cutting off whatever Varl was about to say. “It’s a party, smile and be happy,” the drunk Vangaurdsman said as he filled Varl’s mug up.

  
Aloy smiled at his antics. “It feels nice,” she said, scooting closer to Varl. “Not being alone anymore.

  
Varl held his mug out to her, “Here’s to friends and allies and Scrappersap,” he smiled, banging his mug against Aloy’s.

  
\---

  
Varl made his way through Meridian, ignoring the stares from those wanting a moment's break from rebuilding as he tried following the directions Erend gave him to Aloy’s apartment.

  
Coming to a stop in front of what we hoped was the right door, Varl banged his fist on it a couple times.

  
He let out a sigh of relief when Aloy opened the door with a yawn and a raised eyebrow. “Sona let you into Meridian?” she asked, letting Varl in.

  
“I may not have told her exactly where I was going, just that I wanted to talk with the Anointed,” Varl said, looking around the apartment. “Is all this just for one person?”  
“It belonged to a family, but compared to the Nora, it is a lot for one family,” Aloy said, taking a seat on the couch.

  
Varl followed suit, making himself comfortable next to her. “I came to make sure you didn’t forget your promise with me,” he said. “To tell me everything.”

  
“It’s a long story, are you sure you should be here?” Aloy asked.

  
“I’ll deal with mother after I hear what you have to say,” Varl dismissed.

  
“Are you sure about this?” Aloy asked, pulling her legs up to her chest and wrapping an arm around them. “It will go against the Nora faith, it will discredit everything you know.”

  
“I understand,” Varl said, shifting some to look at her better. “I remember, back at Devil’s Grief, when you asked if I ever wondered what those places looked like before when the Old Ones were still around. I said no because I never had. But after standing there, looking out over it with you, I did,” Varl said. “I started wondering, I started questioning and War Chief did not like that,” Varl said. “She always told me to get those ideas out of my head, that we know what happened. Talking to you though, I realized, we know nothing.”

  
Aloy nodded her head. “I fell into a ruin when I was a child, it’s how I got this,” Aloy said, removing her Focus from her ear. “It’s technology from the Old Ones. It lets you see things, machine paths and weaknesses, people and animals that may be on the other side of the hill and out of sight, trails are easier to follow, ruins are no longer dark and scary,” Aloy said.

  
“Now some of the rumors make sense, about you having a second sight. It always explains why you are such a good hunter,” Varl teased.

  
“My bow skills are not because of this,” Aloy huffed. “I trained just like you to become a Brave.”

  
“I’m teasing Aloy,” Varl said. “I know that you are frightening enough without that device.” Varl was quiet for a moment as he watched Aloy stare at the Focus, her nose scrunched a little. “I love you.”

  
Aloy’s head snapped up as she stared at Varl, her face a mix of confusion and anger. “No you don’t,” she said matter of factly.

  
“I do,” Varl said, a little annoyed at her reaction. He hadn’t been expecting her to throw herself into his arms but still. “I have loved you since you rode through that gate on the Strider,” Varl continued before Aloy could say anything else. “I have tried to ignore it, thinking it was a silly crush, but every time I saw you, my feelings only grew. And when you left for who knows how long, I felt lonely. Even among my friends and family, I felt alone and sad, my thoughts always wondering to you.”

  
“Varl,” Aloy warned, her arms wrapping tighter around her legs.

  
“I love you and even if you don’t love me back, I needed to say it for my own sake. I want to be with you and help you with whatever it is you have to do because I see how much of a burden it is for you, how lonely it has made you, even if you make friends along the way.”

  
Aloy stared at Varl, unsure of what to say. Emotions were not her strong point. She has no experience with love, has never had a crush before. But she always feels happy with Varl around, she feels safe and comfortable. His words always set her at ease. “I don’t know what I feel Varl. I like you but I don’t know if it is love.”

  
“I understand,” Varl said. “I knew when I told you that it would probably end up this way but that doesn’t change the fact that I still want you to tell me everything.”

  
The redhead sat there, staring at Varl, at his soft expression and the determination set in eyes. “All-Mother exits, but not in the form the Nora believe,” Aloy started.


	4. Blizzard

The two Nora huddled together in their makeshift shelter while the blizzard stormed outside.  The rock ledges at least kept out most of the wind, but the cold always found a way into bones.  

Only one subfunction was left to override and reattach to GAIA and of course, it had to be north of Ban-Ur where even the Banuk where weary to tread.

"Thank you," Aloy said, through chattering teeth.

"For what?" Varl asked, reaching for another log to throw on the fire.

"For coming with me on this journey, for being patient with me after your confession in Meridian, for being a friend.  For everything."

"It's been fun and honestly, less stressful than if I had stayed back home and continued working for mother," Varl joked. 

"Emotions just aren't my strong suit," Aloy continued.  "Not the softer ones anyway.  I just needed the time to sort them out, to make sure I was labeling the emotions correctly."

Varl watched Aloy, he could practically see the wheels turning in her head as she chose her words carefully.  

"Love just isn't something I grew up with, not the romantic kind.  But I do think I love you. I can't imagine not having you here with me.  I don't want to be alone in all of this anymore," Aloy said.

"Aloy," Varl said.

"My heart seems to beat faster every time you say my name or smile at me.  My skin feels hot whenever you touch me, even just a brush against my hand."

"Can I kiss you?" Varl asked, turned to face her better.  

Aloy nodded and closed her eyes when Varl leaned in.  She felt his hand cup her cheek and his cold lips meet hers.  

It was a simple kiss that she could barely feel with the cold in her own lips but when Varl went to pull away, her hand shot out on its own and went to the back of his neck, keeping him in place.  

She could feel his grin when he leaned in to kiss her again.


	5. Sona's Blessing

Varl woke to frost on the ground.  

Crawling out of the tent, he tossed another log on the fire to bring it back to life.  He stared at the white ground with a fond smile on his lips.  It reminded him of home.  It was a sign that he was getting closer to home after so long in the south where the heat and humidity felt suffocating; worse than in the Sundom.  

"It's been too long," he muttered, looking at the mountains not even a days ride away.

"It has been," Aloy agreed, taking a seat next to him. 

"Good morning," Varl said, kissing the side of her head.  "Do you want breakfast first or do you want to get going?"

"Let's get going.  I'm feeling nauseous at the thought of food so early," Aloy said,  a hand on her slightly swollen stomach.

"Call the striders, I'll pack everything up," Varl said, helping her up.

\---

"Home," Varl whispered as the strider crossed into Nora lands.  He could see the smoke coming from the fires at Mother's Heart as he took a deep breath of pine woods and cool earth.

"Are you ready?" Aloy asked.

"Are you?" Varl asked back.  "We will be here for a while, I know how suffocating it will feel for you."

"So long as you are around and I can escape every now and then for a breath of fresh air," Aloy said.  "I still don't know how I feel about all this," Aloy admitted, a hand on her stomach again.  

The spearman nudged his strider closer and placed his hand on top of Aloy's.  "Little late for regret now," Varl teased.  "I'll be here by your side," he added when Aloy shot him a death glare.

 

"War Chief," one of the Braves called from the watchtower.  "The Anointed and Varl are back."

"Open the gates," Sona barked at the two guardsmen.  She watched the two approach, tugging their supplies off the striders.

"Mother," Varl smiled, opening his arms wide.

"That's War Chief to you," Sona said as she wrapped her arms around him.  "I have missed you."

"I missed you too," Varl said giving her a tight squeeze before letting go.

"War Chief," Aloy nodded.

"Anointed," Sona nodded back, her eyes on Aloy's stomach.  "When I gave you my blessing to leave, I assumed it was to help Aloy with the Goddess's request," Sona glared.

"And so we have," Varl sighed.  "The Goddess is stronger than before and soon she will be at full strength.  Are you not excited to become a matriarch?"

"We can talk later, you two go drop your supplies off.  The High Matriarchs will want to see Aloy," Sona said.

"That went better than expected," Aloy said.  "I thought she would skin you alive and hang you by your toes."

"She may yet," Varl grumbled as he took one of the packs from Aloy and started toward his old cabin.

 

"Teersa," Aloy said, giving the older woman a hug.  "It is good to see you again."

"It is good to see you again as well," Teersa said.  "How has everything gone?  Has All-Mother gotten her strength back?"

"Mostly, there are still some minor things left to do, but we have to wait for GAI-All-Mother to tell us when," Aloy said.  She hated lying to Teersa, even half-lying but it didn't look like the High Matriarchs had the strength to handle the truth.  She looked so frail, Aloy thought.  But it had been almost five years since she was last here.

"This is great news," Teersa beamed.  "And it looks like there is even more reason to celebrate," Teersa smiled, her hand ghosting Aloy's stomach.  "Your child will be a formidable Brave one day."

"Thank you," Aloy said.  "But Varl and I are tired from our journey."

"Of course," Teersa said, "The party won't start for several hours."

Aloy nodded before heading out of the mountain and back to the cabin.  Varl wasn't there when she got back, but she didn't mind.  Taking a seat on the bed where their packs were near, Aloy shed her armor and pulled one of the furs onver her legs.  "Comforts are such a bad thing," she muttered, thinking of Vala and her first night in Mother's Heart.

\---

Aloy rolled her eyes at Varl's drunken antics.  The other guards had him surrounded, demanding a wrestling match to see if he had gotten any better while away.  And who was Varl to turn down his friend's request.

"Are you here for good?" Sona asked, taking a seat next to Aloy.

"Until All-Mother tells us otherwise, but I think it will be a while," Aloy answered, staring down her mug of tea.  "Are you not happy?"

"I am torn," Sona answered, "As are you, by the look on your face."

Aloy nodded.  "The idea of being a mother scares me," the red head admitted.  "I have no experience with children or even a mother for reference on how to be one."

"That is what the village is for," Sona said.  "you'd be surprised how naturally it comes to you though.  I was.  Just remember, you aren't alone here."

"I have been told that for a while now, but all those years, all the fighting, all the pointless death, they are hard to push aside," Aloy said, taking a long swig of her tea.  "Why are you torn?"

Sona watched Varl for a moment, seeming almost hesitant to answer.  "Because Varl is happy but you are the one that makes him happy."

The two sat there in silence as the drums beat out a cheery tune, laughter and singing filling the air.

"When we got to Mother's Crown after finishing the off the murderers from the Proving, Varl wouldn't stop talking about you.  How strong you were, how beautiful you were, how awe-inspiring.  I had never seen him look at someone the way he looked at you.  Every time a rumor made it to the village, he would light up.  And when he cowered in the mountain after the Eclipse attacked, he wouldn't stop talking about how you would come and help save us.  I knew he would either become your mate or die alone."

Aloy watched Sona with several side glances as the War Cheif started off into space.

"The way he talked about you after the Proving, it sounded like I had lost my last child.  And then he went off with you, barely a goodbye or a look back and for years I waited for him.  There were days when I felt something in my bones so strongly, I thought for sure he was dead and I had really lost my child.  Now he wears one of those earpieces, from the Old Ones and speaks of things that sound like blasphemy."

"I wanted him to come with me," Aloy admitted.  "I didn't want to be alone anymore on this journey but I fought him on it.  I didn't want him to throw away everything he knew for me.  But he made his decision and I am sorry for the pain it caused you.  He never would have wanted to hurt you."

"No child means to hurt their parent," Sona said.  "But he is here and he is happy.  I can't ask for more," the older woman asked.  "I give the two of you my blessing."


End file.
